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Wednesday, October 27, 2010

3WW-Taking Liberty Part 6

Wow!  It's hard to believe that my little experiment has gone this far.  Still not sure where exactly it's headed, but I've been getting good feedback each week, so I'll see how it goes.

If you're a writer that needs a little kick to get started, check out 3WW.  It's a great way to get that creative boost you need.

If you don't know what's going on, or need a refresh, check out my Taking Liberty Summary page.



Dena's grip around my neck strengthened as her sobs became deeper.  With each tremor that ran through her body, I could feel myself dissolve a little more.  Like watching butter melt in a stirred pot. 

For a moment, all my senses heightened.  My body was fighting its diminishment.   The smell of the flowers ran rampant for a moment and caused me to gag.  The sounds of crying pressed like a physical weight against me.  Then...it receded.

That presence, that something waiting for me grew stronger.  I thought to myself, "This is what it's like to go crazy."

And deep inside, I heard a small voice say, "No, it's not.  That's much worse.  This...it's just like going to sleep."

The cadence of the voice was sweet and soothing.  It sounded so much like my mother singing me to sleep as a child that I had a moment of painful nostalgia. 

I could feel a wave of black slowly start to eat away at my vision.  Warmth enveloped me.

"It's hard to stay strong all the time isn't it?"  The voice whispered to me.  It sounded closer now.  Like someone in the next room.

From two miles away, I could hear soft weeping and organ music begin to play.  A monotonous voice began speaking words that I couldn't understand.

"What--" I said, the words garbled in my mouth.

"Don't worry. Just relax." The voice said, now next to me.

I felt the fragile sense of control I had start to be torn from me.

"No, I don't want this." I slurred.

A hand gently caressed my face, lips touching mine as soft as a sigh.

"Shhh." The voice breathed into my ear.

I tried to shake my head, but the caresses turned hard, and the lips insistent.

"Just for a moment, let me see through you." 

The voice had stopped being kind, but was now pleading. 

"I want to see all of them squirming at my funeral."







I can't decide if I want Liberty to be just a sad mistake or something more malevolent.  I think I wound up with a good mixture today.  What are your reactions?

If you're taking part in NaNo, feel free to buddy me

Don't forget to check out my Small Packages Blogfest.  Posting day is November 16th.  Spread the word!

2 comments:

omj said...

Like watching butter melt. Nice. Great experiment! Thanks for sharing.

The Bear Monk said...

I really liked this one. Feels like a malevolence born of desperation and anger. Just goes to show...you don't pick on people or they'll die and come back and posses your bully ass.

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